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Learns How To “Touch Yourself 30 Ways” With DeyaDirect
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K104's (KKDA) DeDe McGuire talks with Deya "Direct" Smith about the new book.
|When a woman flows freely|
There's nothing like a woman who's in her flow. When she's in her groove not only is life good for her but everyone around her reaps the benefits.
Being in her flow is a result of her feeding her spirit. It's when she's free to live beyond one role in her life but she can in fact fulfill all the roles that make sense to her. I'm not talking about being "Everywoman;" For her it's enough to be her OWN woman.
Multiple roles are nothing new to us. As women seeking and achieving success, we often find ourselves wearing various hats to successfully function in our roles of mother, daughter, sister-friend, lover, boss, employee, performer, writer, preacher, teacher, and the list goes on. We must discover and find effective ways to make time to do what is important to us. For some reason, when we fall in love we tend to give up our power. We forget about how we had-it-going-on before the relationship. Remember, that's why he fell for you in the first place - because you are a desirable and a valuable woman.
There is so much more to today's woman than meets the eye. At any given moment, a sister may be working as a vice president of a bank, political activist, or secretary. On the right, she's a mother, a sister-friend, a girlfriend or wife. Look to the left, this sister is flowing as producer, actress, soul-singer, rap diva or dancer. These are the dynamics of being a multi-faceted.
Some of us get stuck in one or two roles. Not because there's not more to us, but because life can be overwhelming. We need to keep our motivation and sense of self. Stay focused on the dream that makes us feel free, creative, smart or special. Our spiritual, mental and financial survival requires us to function in all of our roles without shame or guilt. Creating satisfaction in our inner-most self is as essential as breathing.
You can't be all things to all people all the time. But if you are savvy, you can be all of yourself for yourself. There's skill and technique involved in knowing how to be the desirable woman at work, who looks a lot different from the woman at home, the woman in bed, the woman in prayer, or the woman on stage. Our various roles require that we utilize different abilities. It's not only knowing how to speak or move in a particular role, it's also knowing when to do it and when to pull back. For instance, speaking to your child should not sound like you're in a poetry slam. And how you interact with your man should not mirror your behavior in a business meeting. Leave that tight butt, control freak in the office. How you laugh out loud, from the gut, with your girls is different than laughing with someone you just met. Why? It's because different roles require different attitudes, style, and energy.
You see, when a woman can flow authentically and freely, all areas in her life are enhanced. Her business world influences her creative world. Her spiritual world inspires her personal world. And, her confident world strengthens her insecure world. They are all parts of the whole - the Multifaceted You.
The truth be told, who-you-are is indeed multifaceted. Yet this is a realization that can only be embraced and maximized by doing the self-work. I still bring that rambunctious little girl with me everywhere I go. The difference is that I'm learning how and when to use her mouth, energy, and edge.
As you grow in personal and professional relationships,you need both the wisdom to work what you've got and the savvy to work with your best asset- You.
Deya "Direct" Smith is a producer on "The Tom Joyner Morning Show" and host of "Girlfriend FM," as well as "Beyond the Studio" celebrity interviews on BlackAmericaWeb.com.